Severe agoraphobia and severe facial pain Situations are similar (REVISTING POST FROM JULY 2023)

Dear Max,

As today (thank God) I got lucky enough to find someone on taskmaster to pick up my prescriptions. (because I couldn’t do it) due to the headaches 😫(which are everyday)

I am terrified, (that’s an understatement) I can’t even pick up my own prescriptions)

I’ve been trying as I lay here all day and everyday with ice on my head to think of another situation where it was this bad.

I suppose sometimes I forget 20 or so years ago the debiliting agoraphobia (which caused basically the same situation I am in now. (Drastic horrible things were done to me) because mom was dying and somehow I had to function)

I forget how I couldn’t even step into a store. Could barely drive. Could barely make it out the door. Then at some point it really became a lot like the situation is now. I tried to find medical assistants to get to doctors (I couldnt) I can’t believe it’s still the same 20 years later.

There’s no company that will do it. I also absolutely could not get to any store. I had no food. I tried to call churches to help (but they don’t help you if you are trapped in your house) some churches.

So the ex actually had to order things from walgreens and ship them to me. Even though he lived in California.

He had dumped me and brought me back to Memphis. I begged him to take me back because I was completely debilitated.. thats how I ended up back in California for 12 years. But I did improve and I wish the relationship had ended then

But that’s neither here nor there. I have no idea how I got the cats medical care. I suppose I was lucky enough that they didn’t need it (except that Georgie had diabetes) and had to be at the vet nearly every day. (Perhaps the anxiety was better by then

So now we are back in basically the same situation. (Except due to a medical situation) instead of a mental one) And there really seems no way out this time. I mean I’m really serious. REALLY

But yes being completely helpless has happened before. But there was a way out then. There’s no way out now.

What do i do? Lord have mercy in christ what am I going to do? And I have no answer.

And the pain every single day is just intolerable. It makes me wonder of things.

Meowmmy ❤️